So it was then on Thursday, 13 November evening that the Mayor, Cr Gould welcomed Mr Donald Lee, a prominent 'guest' from Talkeetna, Alaska, population 770. The Civic Reception funded by Albury ratepayers was attended by about 30 people including councillors Duncan-Strelec, Van de ven and Betterridge.
It was a convivial affair as it should be. No one should be denied the hospitality of the citizens of Albury and the thirty people who attended the reception were impressed with Mr Lee's presentation of the virtues of Alaska. After all we're mates - comrade's in-arms in Iraq and Afghanistan and you can't get better mateship than that. The four councillors who attended were spellbound with Mr Lee's presentation and so they should be. Alaska is a very beautiful place with spectacular scenery, spectacular wildlife many species of which are available for huntin'. As well as just lookin' there's also fishin' and the drinkin'. You have to have a certain resilience to call yourself an Alaskan. It is essential that you're a good shot and have well performing liver.
Even Palin the Republican candidate for vice-president made it abundantly clear that she had the right stuff. She had no hesitation in posing with her daughter with a dead moose she shot. Alaskan woman can do it too - get in the car and go shoot a couple of moose. I don't know if they ate it. Then again there are other options. Apparently Alaska has the highest percentage of taxidermists in the world. Getting a moose mounted over your fireplace in Alaska is a very important social and cultural statement. In the same country (America) for example a New Yorker's equivalent trophy would be a Picasso over the fireplace. It has to be big though, so the eternal search goes on for the biggest moose. There's not a moment's rest for the poor bloody moose.
That's why in Alaska people fly up from the mainland to buy the smaller discarded moose heads and take them back. Even George Bush has a moose's head over one of his fireplaces. Not that you need a fireplace in Texas because like Camelot the climate's almost perfect in the Lone Star State. Then again there are other options here as well. A colleague of Borderline was emphatic that George Bush made certain alterations at which he occasionally entertains guests by flicking a switch and the moose's eyes light up. Apparently it's such a side-splitting affair that some guests have to be revived with oxygen.
Mr Lee's sponsor for the evening was Cr Duncan-Strelec recently returned from Alaska where she obtained her pilot's licence. Borderline is unclear whether Mr Lee taught Cr Duncan-Strelec how to fly. It could be so, he must have taught her something as he himself was a member of Talkeetna Community Council, perhaps they were just kindred spirits. Perhaps they just talked tactics and weren't kindred spirits and he taught her to fly. Whatever the reason perhaps while Mr Lee is here we could discuss a sister city type relationship which would be very nice. After all, Australians are pretty tough themselves. You have to be with all the heat and flies.
Borderline welcomes Mr Donald Lee to Albury. We hope you have a wonderful stay. I trust you will be able to attend a council meeting, hopefully a full council meeting and perhaps we can maybe pass on to you the refinements of local democracy and the notions of mateship so endearing you need Baz Luhrmann to explain the grandness of it all. That's why it's to the eternal sadness of Borderline that Baz never filmed Australia in Albury -Wodonga.
The soiree held for Mr Lee we believe is an exciting new initiative that we think could make Albury one of the greatest, most hospitable places on this earth. Everyone who visits Albury could have a Civic Reception. Let's face it, Culcairn, for example (Population 1400) has available a number of 'prominent guests' who would appreciate a Civic Reception. Just this week Borderline had a cup of coffee with a prominent guest from Blackheath up in the Blue Mountains. Nothing in the letterbox.
Then suddenly a dark cynicism descended on Borderline. Do you have to actually lobby the mayor (in this instance Cr Gould) and convince her of the prominence of that person? Then again you could easily fudge the facts and make what is essentially a mildly prominent person into a very significant prominent person. How can you tell? What criteria do you use to make your decision? - perhaps the Mayor, Cr Gould uses some type of points test like when you want to enter Australia ? What if your request is refused on political grounds ? What about when you're refused and they take it the wrong way? Talk about opening a can of worms.
That's why in the true democratic spirit everyone visiting Albury should be declared a prominent person and invited to a civic reception. Albury Councillors could make up a roster. The Mayor, Councillor Gould, could make a fully gowned appearance and drink to their health. She would have to drink non-alcoholic champagne though otherwise at the end of the day she might find herself as full as a New South Wales hospital.
I wonder what they do in Talkeetna, Alaska. Obviously they have Civic Receptions for prominent persons. Did Cr Duncan-Strelec attend such a function? Perhaps one day she might have a slide night or something equivalent and explain it all. We would think it would be a very enjoyable evening with a few drinks and the occasional hors d'oeuvre.
